How do we get through the first Diwali, birthday or anniversary after losing someone?

keep it simple, make room for both sadness and memory, and include the loved one in a small, gentle way.

The first festivals and family days after a death are often the hardest. Many families, by custom, do not celebrate major festivals in the first year — no new clothes, sweets or firecrackers — though lighting a lamp for God is usually still done. Relatives often bring sweets to the grieving home on the festival, a kind tradition that gently draws the family back into life.

Emotionally, it helps to plan ahead. Decide together what you will keep and what you will skip. Many families light one lamp for the departed beside the photo, cook their favourite dish, or give dāna in their name on the day. It is fine to step away from a gathering for a few minutes when it becomes too much.

Children still need some joy, and a small, quiet celebration for them does not dishonour the departed. Over time, festivals become a way of remembering rather than only a reminder of loss.

Source: common family practice

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