Is it my duty to care for my ageing parents?

yes — “treat your mother and father as God” — but care can take many forms, and your own health counts too.

When a student finished Vedic study, the teacher's parting words included “mātṛdevo bhava, pitṛdevo bhava” — let your mother be a god to you, let your father be a god to you (Taittirīya Upaniṣad 1.11). Stories like Śravaṇa Kumāra carrying his blind parents, and Puṇḍalīka, for whom Lord Viṭṭhala waited on a brick while he served his parents, show how highly this service is valued.

Today, families are spread across cities and countries, and both partners often work. Dharma does not demand one fixed arrangement. Living together, regular visits, daily calls, arranging good medical care, or choosing a well-run care home when needs exceed what you can safely give — all can be done with love. What matters is that parents feel respected, safe and not forgotten.

Caregiving is hard; ask siblings to share it, and look after your own health and marriage too. If your situation is specific, Ask Chiluka.

Source: Taittirīya Upaniṣad 1.11 · Puṇḍalīka and Viṭṭhala, Paṇḍharpur

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